Roy, Utah—

4 of my 5 children have been estranged from me due to parental alienation for over 2 years. They all live 5 minutes away from me. I am not allowed to see my grandbabies (11 of them..ages 3-15). I was their only grandparent in their lives..many of them even living with me for a time with their parents.
My children’s dad that abandoned them for over 10 year. He had been abusive and a restraining order even had to be obtained 3 years after he left. He was still allowed to see them, he chose to have nothing to do with any of them, at all.

About 10 years ago he re-entered their lives. It took several years before they developed trust again. Little by little, as is common with parental alienation, even in adult children, he begin to craft an alternate reality version of his absence which now they believe and will have nothing to do with me.

I have been beyond heartbroken and have tried to reach out, over and over. Nothing…

This past month I have literally thought I could not make it one more day without my beloved children and grandbabies. No amount of service projects to try to organize to dispel the heartache have helped. Last night, being the recipient of an anonymous heavy bag, with a canning jar in it lifted my spirits. It rattled a bit as I carried it in. Aah I thought, 12 bean soup mix. Perfect for our snowy Utah weather!

I took the jar out and shock set in. Who? Why? How?

Today I took a few pictures and posted comments of gratitude. A friend related that I had received a Christmas Jar. Puzzled, I of course hit internet search. Copious tears as I realize that my perception of a broken immediate family has been replaced by anonymous arms enfolding me from every direction. I am loved, I am cared for…I truly mean something to someone.

—Nola Spicer